This is a spoof NY TIMES from The Yes Men!
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U.S. Army helicopters begin moving troops and equipment from Saddam Hussein’s former Baghdad palace. (COURTESY ARMY.MIL)
Ex-Secretary Apologizes for W.M.D. Scare300,000 Troops Never Faced Risk of Instant ObliterationEx-Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice reassured soldiers that the Bush Administration had known well before the invasion that Saddam Hussein lacked weapons of mass destruction. Court Indicts Bush on High Treason ChargeGeorge W. Bush, the 43rd President of the United States, was indicted Monday on charges of high treason.
Troops to Return ImmediatelyOperation Iraqi Freedom and Operation Enduring Freedom were brought to an unceremonious close today. Streets Come Alive as Relief and Exuberance Greet End of ConflictsThousands take to the streets to celebrate the announced end to the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.
A New New Deal for the 21st Century
Nation Sets its Sights on Building a Sane EconomyPresident Barack Obama has called for swift passage of his administration’s Safeguards for a New Economy (S.A.N.E.) bill. The omnibus economic package includes a federal maximum wage, mandatory “True Cost Accounting,” a phased withdrawal from complex financial instruments, and other measures intended to improve life for ordinary Americans.
The Economy
Maximum Wage Law Passes CongressCongress limits top salaries to fifteen times the minimum wage. Nationalized Oil To Fund Climate Change EffortsCongress has voted to place ExxonMobil, ChevronTexaco, and other major oil companies under public stewardship. Labor Dept. Launches Job Creation ProgramThe Department of Labor is scrambling to propose new standards that will affect every American worker.
Education
Education Department Plans National Tax Base for SchoolsTwenty-three states following the lead of a landmark decision in Ohio. Congress Returns Civics to High School CurriculumCongressional spokespeople announced a funding appropriation to return the subject of civics to high school curricula nationwide. All Public Universities To Be FreeA bill to eliminate tuition at public universities is making its way through Congress and is expected to pass within days.
Infrastructure
Crumbling Infrastructure Brings OpportunitiesAdvocates seek to focus investment on proven, sustainable technologies to help move the country away from its dependency on fossil fuels. High-Speed Internet Hits Fast Track to AppalachiaMassive public support pushes the Internet Freedom Preservation Act through both houses of Congress. New York Bike Path System Expanded DramaticallyNinth Avenue and beyond.
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